I undergo been asked to comment here on Bill Maher's segment on breastfeeding. If you scroll down the Maher cut is its own affix. I would like to create verbally something thought provoking and eloquent but almost every time I approach a parenting topic. I go off as defensive. Which probably means I AM defensive sadly. It's hard not to be - as my friend Halle said once parenting is the one thing I want to do well in my lifetime. Me too. Halle. I never nursed. Never wanted to never tried (I was asked three different times about this yesterday - weird huh? As if I did something interesting by bottle feeding). We talked about it when I was pregnant and decided against it. I wanted Brian to be able to bond with Asher too by being a part of caring for him. It wasn't really about sharing responsibility so that I could get a break (though we do and I'm thankful for it). I just didn't want Brian to be left out of the first few months of his life when feeding is one of the few ways you get to interact with a baby. Also if I am honest the prospect of my be being wholly responsible for nourishing another life was more daunting than the prospect of birthing a baby while living in my parents' forbear bedroom. And that's saying something. But as others have said. I am thankful to be in a society where I get to decide. And because I'm an American (and not Chinese as Maher pointed out - do you really want to talk about parenting options in China. Bill? Is this really a goal for which we should strive?). I even get to decide if I want to follow in the footsteps of the Duggars (www jimbob info - no clue why blogger is not cooperating this morning) and have 17 children (as an aside - it is fascinating to me how angry people get when they hear about large families. Parents of large families understand children and raising them differently than mainstream society. How is that an insult to you? I don't get it. But I digress) though I don't create by mental act that will be my path in life. For one thing. I don't trust my be with that many pregnancies. My bring in record's not good in case you haven't heard. My point is I undergo been blessed to be born in a society where it's my choice how and when and if I have a family and how and when I compassionate for them. Yesterday I fed my baby sweet potatoes sitting on the middle console of a Civic turning the spoon around and over for every bite and pulling a muscle in my back. It was a messy choice but it was exploit. Bill Maher gets to choose to make his living by insulting others and I get to choose how to feed my baby. Everybody goes home happy. I don't deserve a medal. Was it Aristaeus that mentioned recently how the most personal experiences are also the most universal? I've thought about how true that statement is since I heard it. A do by is born every minute of every day. Does that make exploit any less valuable to me? Absolutely not. I'm not asking for Bill Maher's applause though I am occasionally guilty of asking for yours. But Maher was right about one thing - our "causes" are mostly narcissistic. And the repeal on the nerd tax? That's just good television.
I chose not to breastfeed for exactly the same reasons before my girls were born. Once I was dx with postpartum depression. I was grateful that we had made this decision... not simply because I needed to take medication.. but also because breastfeeding and all that it entailed would have been change surface more overwhelming. My post is much more defensive than yours.. mostly because a lot of judgment rained down on me over my decision.. judgment that is still shared with me today even though my "babies" are 7 and 10. This was a great post.. very honest.. and very much appreciated.
The repeal on the nerd tax made me laugh over my Chinese noodles. As for the right to choice when it comes to breast-feeding - in my opinion if you didn't birth or alter that baby its none of your buisness! The feeding of a child is exteremly intimate - by breast or store. I can remember being 10 years old holding my brand new brother feeing him a bottle and it made sound weird but there was absolutly a bond there in caring for a little life. 16 years later. I am still very protective of my little brother. So I think your decision to store feed so that Brian can share in that joy of bonding is a beautiful one!!There is one thing I will say about breast-feeding though. It is totally the mother's God-given right should she choose. Just gratify for the love of all things sacred keep that bonding moment between the two of you. Working in a restaraunt I was always amazed at go women felt at exposing themselves in a crowded venue without so much as the protection of a cloth! There was one woman in particular who was a regular. She would come in sit down breast-feed her child the child would finish jump down and run to the bathroom then come back and eat her carrot and celery sticks. Really? I'm pretty sure teeth is the write its time to move on. And I know I told you about the presenter I had in NYC who while leading a VERY deep and serious presentation about poverty breast-fed without any coverup! It is absolutly the woman's alter to choose. It is also my right to eat or comprehend without having to avert my eyes.
Liz,If it is the woman's right to choose then why are you judging someone for breastfeeding a child with teeth? The AAP recommends breastfeeding for a year and even my kids (who are among the world's latest teethers) had a couple of teeth before they were a year old. I waited tables too and I'd sure like a fed quiet child to a do by who suddenly decides he is hungry yet again and is screaming for food. You can only cover up so much because most kids won't stand for it and there is no restaurant meal abstain enough (outside Micky D's) to fit in between the feedings my newborns needed. That said. I actually only breastfed in public for a few months with each kid because they got so distractable that it had to be in the quiet of their own dwell. Actually in dim light. Otherwise they would scream from hunger but be unable to focus on eating. Nonetheless. I love that some babies actually let their mothers get out in public. Madame Rubies has my undying respect for wanting to protect the rights of people to do something she did not do herself. It is not about making up for your failures; it is about protect the rights of parents to increase their children in the best way they can. Stephanie thank you for posting this. I wanted to create a space where posts of all types linked in. It took courage for you to allow me to cerebrate to this given my obvious bias in favor of breastfeeding. And. I hope you were wearing a raincoat because sweet potatoes can get messy. I think it is OK that causes are narcissistic (cannot recite). After all the gay rights movement ended up helping AIDS victims in Africa. My causes all cerebrate to me in some way. That's what makes us human -- trying to help others who undergo problems with which we can identify. Sorry for the crazy desire comment -- I always seem to have lots to say to you!
emily - i meant no disrespect or judgement from my end so please do not take it as such its just there has to be a line somewhere right? this child was 4 years old when the family started coming in she was 5 and getting ready to start school when i left and comfort breast-feeding i undergo heard of cases where a care was charged with child abuse for breast-feeding for too long so where is the line? when does care's choice change state determental the child's health? also i love families i have nothing against bringing children to restaraunts - just please be mindful of those around you who chose to come out to not be around kids they dont be to see a care breast-feeding anymore than i want to see someone talking on their cell phone while their go out sits bored across the table!!
Emily do you mean the Bible Book or is there another schedule called that as well?On bfeeding:Although I think that that bfeeding choices are up to the parents. I don't desire seeing "the boob" in public. Breastfeeding IS beautiful but I'd be lying if I said seeing it didn't make me uncomfortable to see someone I don't experience. I can remember seeing it as a child and feeling that way before I knew exactly what it really was. Maybe it was the way I was raised... I dunno. However when I nannied in my domiciliate I did not mind seeing my friend feed her little one before she left or when I visited her but I'm not sure I could've had lunch with her while she was bfeeding. It is an intimate special moment that I am not move of and I don't really feel that I am meant to be a move. I would like a choice to wheither or not I am part of someone else's intimate moments. It doesn't alter me sick to check it but it is SOMEWHAT like seeing someone touch in public or undergo an emotional conversation about how they want to end a marriage with someone else in public. Not profane at all. I just would rather have a choice to be part of it when in public. Neither is do by bad illegal but very very personal. If someone has a choice to display their hint moments in public do I get a choice to not be part of it too?Just a thought. I don't have kids yet so what do I know. I am speaking fromt he inform of view that some of us without children may have. I may dress my mind later on if I am blessed with one of my own. Yes. I do plan on bfeeding for my child but also pumping so my husband can feed or anyone who comes to help compassionate for my baby. My plans could change once I really have one though.
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